Sonny, a very well constructed essay, that demonstrates clearly that you have researched, read and thought about the essay question and the function of the archive in general. I agree that William Collie’s image of a Jersey Market Woman is remarkable, on many levels. It is a staged image in Collie’s studio using models based on his observations of ‘real’ French market women in St Helier. Great that this image and research may have inspired you to respond photographically and develop a project alongside your Personal Study – that’s exactly the purpose of it!
A couple of things to consider moving forward:
1. Be careful not to overuse similar phrases, such as ‘stood out to me’.
2. Try and write it from a third person perspective, if possible, ie. avoid ‘I’
3. Use quotes from literary sources where appropriate and comment to develop a critical argument ie. either approve/ disaprove etc.
4. Use Harvard System of Referencing and write a bibliography
5. For illustrations use captions, artist name, title, year it was made, medium.
Sonny, a very well constructed essay, that demonstrates clearly that you have researched, read and thought about the essay question and the function of the archive in general. I agree that William Collie’s image of a Jersey Market Woman is remarkable, on many levels. It is a staged image in Collie’s studio using models based on his observations of ‘real’ French market women in St Helier. Great that this image and research may have inspired you to respond photographically and develop a project alongside your Personal Study – that’s exactly the purpose of it!
A couple of things to consider moving forward:
1. Be careful not to overuse similar phrases, such as ‘stood out to me’.
2. Try and write it from a third person perspective, if possible, ie. avoid ‘I’
3. Use quotes from literary sources where appropriate and comment to develop a critical argument ie. either approve/ disaprove etc.
4. Use Harvard System of Referencing and write a bibliography
5. For illustrations use captions, artist name, title, year it was made, medium.
11/18 = C/B