Here is a link to my photobook The Aftermath
Artist Study: Robert Clayton
Robert Clayton is an English photographer who is renown for his sole work on Estate from Lion Farm Estate in 1991. The estate near Birmingham was scheduled for a re-vamp when Clayton began to take photographs with the content of these images varying between portraits of residence or distant landscapes to show the sheer size of the complex. The renovation of the estate would consequent in the moving of residents, causing upset to the occupants of the estate, which is fundamentally what Clayton is capturing, along with the outdated accommodation that has become accustom to those who live there.
I selected Robert Clayton as my artist inspiration for his unique lens and investigation into lower-class British life, giving a balanced perception and not biased. He creates images which are both aesthetically pleasing and have covert meanings as the documentary approach exposes a way of life which not many are aware of. The work of Clayton coincides with my concept as he documents the lower social orders and their struggle of being rehoused, but by producing this book he would have illuminated the struggles the lower class undergo within society, hopefully reducing the stigma against them.
Robert Clayton appears to use a more stand-back, social documentary approach to his photography as there is a substantial distance between the photographer and the two main subjects. In the foreground of the image are the two main subjects which appears to be a mother and her young daughter, who presumably live on the estate, which fundamentally highlights the importance this complex provides. As well as the clothes, there are indications of the era that photograph was captured in as the small car in the background has an 80s-esque representation and the dominant telephone poles. Another factor to consider is the over-casting shadow which shades the majority of the right-hand side of them image, perhaps reflecting the government’s destructive yet constructive intervention with these people’s lives.
Artist Study: Doug DuBois
Following the exploration of Doug DuBois’s My Last Day At Seventeen which was scattered in my classroom, I decided to delve into learning more about DuBois as his work upon Russell Heights was very interesting and relevant to what I was trying to portray as a seventeen year old photography student.
Doug DuBois is a middle-aged American photographer from a middle-class background, making him some what of an ‘outsider’ to the life of an Irish council estate. Having already looked at one book, I decided to explore other pieces of work DuBois has produced, for instance, All the Days and the Nights, a British journal which examined family relations under stress. DuBois exploits his position as an outsider to photograph and capture alternative scenes which have links to what I am looking to portray.
DuBois’s style is heavily tableaux, particularly in My Last Day At Seventeen as the subjects he looks to capture are sensitive for some families or groups of people, so by grasping the co-operation of the subjects demonstrates he is not being disrespectful, a matter which takes time, effort and patience.
IMAGE ANALYSIS
Technically, the format of the image is slightly more rectangle than square in order to coincide with the sizing of the window pane which gives a visual on what happens beyond what we assume to be this young man’s home. The window creates the background of the image as it creates a physical yet transparent barrier between the home and the estate which could occur deliberately by the photographer as he looks to examine and analyse individuals alone away from their neighbors or peers. The limited view we have of the home reveals it is lived in as washing is hanging from the curtain pole as well as the tow mugs of tea, with one potentially being for DuBois himself as he, as he explained in an interview with Lens Culture, created good friendships and relationships with those who lived in Russell Heights. The image produced definitely coincides with the rule of thirds as the fundamental subject in question is just slightly off center piece with a translucent vision of the estate which is the main subject of the book, suggesting the young man is very much a part of the estate and community it has to offer. As we know, DuBois uses tableaux techniques in order to capture his photographs, potentially meaning he has positioned the subject in this fashion to demonstrate a level of trouble or stress due to what happens in and around the estate. There is also a degree of irony as the young man’s body language connotes closure as he is keeping his arms close to his chess, however, in the background there is the curtains which are spread open, meaning the estate is always a welcoming and accepting place to live despite your troubles. As far as DuBois is concerned this allegation is true as his five-year project was greeted well with the occupants of the estate. The book was published in 2015 yet the curtains and other interior attributes appear quite dated, giving a crucial insight into the socio-economic status of the estate. However, despite this factor, DuBois captures vibrant and illuminating colours which creates a positive atmosphere despite the body language and extensive analysis.
Book Analogy
Following hours of assembling my book, I have finally pieced together a formula I think is suitable. I have organised my photographs and essay in the following fashion…
ESSAY FINAL
In what way has Carolle Benitah and Laia Abril used different photographic processes and techniques in experimenting, responding to the notion of family archives and complex emotions?
“But the photos reawakened an anguish of something both familiar and totally unknown, the kind of disquieting strangeness that Freud spoke about. Those moments, fixed on paper, represented me, spoke about me and my family, told things about my identity, my place in the world, my family history and its secrets, the fears that constructed me, and many other things that contributed to who I am today.”- Carolle Benitah
“In Freud’s psychoanalysis, fragments, traces, or clues engage the imagination to release streams of emotion.”- Mary Bergstein in Mirrors of Memory: Freud, Photography, and the History of Art
When starting this project I did not realise the emotional impact it was going to have on me. As I explored my families memories, previous moments that are cherished by them and other memories that are not. They began to affect me in a deep way that is hard to describe. There is an emotional connection that can be found when looking at a part of your own history. I was looking at the moments that constructed me as a person. This is what drew me to manipulate these memories using photographs from our family album, thereby showing another side to these memories, that as people we do not notice. I wanted to show the spiritual side of the old archive family photos I was looking at. Showing how an emotion towards a certain photo can change after time due to unwanted events and struggles. Using symbolism and manipulation I wanted to destroy and create a new meaning to these family photos. I also included un-manipulated family photographs usually to emphasis comparison and change. I used these family photos almost like intervals to separate the new photos I have taken. The photographs that I made as response to my project used chiaroscuro lighting. This lighting was meant to represent God. I took photos of each family member reacting to this light. The family photos created another interesting element that varied the book. I wanted to renew and re-imagine these memories. Old photos that were just seen as a nice photo for the family to look at now has meaning for what person is going through or has gone through.
Inspirations for this project have come from many art movements, such as Dadaism, philosophical questions as well as personal thoughts and experiences. I opened this essay with a quote about memory, Mary Bergstein talks about how we are forced to re-live and remember a moment when we look at a photo . For example she says “In the world of archaeology and art history, photographs of fragments of ruined objects or human statues can serve as highly emotional reminders of the passage of time,”(Bergstein:http://bigthink.com), although Bergstein was talking about archaeology and art, I think this applies for old family photos as well. She also goes onto to say how our feelings towards memories can change due to old historic buildings being destroyed this could be said the same about life experiences, we can look back at a happier time or in some cases a difficult time and think differently, sometimes the opposite to how you felt when that photo was taken. For myself I would look at these photos and see a happier time to where I was. I also would look at these photos and find an emotional connection even when I wasn’t in them as they are a part of my history and journey. I wanted to change these memories to show a spiritual side of the photograph that is significant to me today. It showed how I felt about those photos in a physical way rather than just talking about it. Memories and photos are powerful things that in many cases cannot be tampered with as they a part of someone. This is why didn’t want to distort and manipulate those photos digitally, I wanted people to notice that they have been manipulated, rather than me trying to trick people into thinking that was what the initial photo looked like. I wanted the viewer to look how it has been changed and transformed. One of my influences was by the Dadaism technique of montage.
Dadaism was a European avant-garde art movement of the early 20th century. It was a movement that wanted to move away from the normal conventions of normal day life and the way art was normally represented. Dadaism was influenced by other movements around the beginning of the 20th century such as Cubism, Futurism, Constructivism, Expressionism and was seen as the corner stone of the surrealism movement. Key artists were people like Kurt Schwitters and Francis Picabia. Salvador Dali, who was a surrealist artist that took a lot of inspiration from Dadaism, once said “Surrealism is destructive, but it destroys only what it considers to be shackles limiting our vision” (Dali: https://www.artsy.net). The main aspect I took inspiration from Dadaism was the montage technique as I was destroying my old family photos then rebuilding it to create a new meaning. Dadaism was all about going against the ordinary, breaking the rules, leaving the conventions of art behind. This is the mind-set I had when creating this part to my book. It allowed me to be free to make mistakes then carry on till I found that I had created something that corresponds to where my mind-set was at the time and clearly showing the thought process it took to get there. These photos were used in-between my chiaroscuro studio shot photos that take up most of the book. These montage influenced photos gave a refreshing break from those photos as it was something to look at with more colour and sporadic influences. Chiaroscuro lighting was another prominent aspect in my work. The use of light and darks in the photos I took of my family showed this and contributed to the majority of the book. This technique was first used by painters such as Leonardo Da Vinci and Caravaggio. Often in these works of art an angel is featured in the picture and often the angel would illuminate the whole painting. The dark shadows are extremely dark and the light are selective in the painting giving the artist the power to focus on the important and more striking parts of the painting’s composition and meaning. It also featured in film as a technique well known as ‘film noir’ that refers to low light and high contrast imagery that often found in old Hollywood crime dramas. I wanted to focus of the main subject of the photograph working like a spotlight. This deep contrast and chiaroscuro lighting is an effect I’ve been experimenting with a long time, I’ve now grown a larger understanding of what looks good and how to achieve this.
I took inspiration from multiple photographers one being Carolle Benitah. I liked the way she manipulated images using embroidery focusing mainly on her upbringing and the issues that surrounded her. She used embroidery as a medium as it was seen as the standard thing for women to do in her family as the men left the home to work. In an interview she says “Embroidering is primarily a feminine activity. In the past, the embroiderer was seen as a paragon of virtue. Waiting was tied to this activity: women embroidered, hoping for the return of the man to the home. Embroidery is intimately linked to the milieu in which I grew up. Girls in a “good family” used to learn how to sew and embroider — essential activities for “perfect women”. My mother embroidered her trousseau.” (Benitah: https://www.lensculture.com) This frustrated Benitah and caused her to make these beautiful and striking photos. The photos she created had a theme of red thread and beads throughout her piece; the artist says the colour red represents the colour of violence and sexuality throughout her work. This theme connects these memories and showing a clear and structured narrative. The artist does not completely disclose the narrative of the book; this is up to the audience to work out. However, she does go onto to say her work is related to emotions. This is very similar to my own work as much of my own edited photos were manipulated based on the emotions I felt from the photo now looking back in retrospect. In the interview Benitah goes on to talk about how this kind of work can be therapeutic; she describes “With each stitch I make a hole with a needle. Each hole is a putting to death of my demons. It’s like an exorcism. I make holes in paper until I am not hurting anymore.” (Benitah: https://www.lensculture.com) I could relate to this kind of work. Personally it gave me the freedom to explore the ideas and issues I wanted to get through on paper. It allowed me to make mistakes and carry on. It also allowed me to release any underground emotions that I did not know I had. This was the most therapeutic part to my book as it allowed me to experiment with different mediums. The medium I used the most was ink. I used a different coloured and sized pens to do this. I used pens because I found it the easiest way to place my emotions on a photo. I often draw random things when I’m thinking or alone and I used this in my work. The colour red also features a lot in these photos. I used this colour for every time I drew a crucifix or cover someone in it. I used the colour red because in many bibles when Jesus speaks it is in red to show significance. I wanted this colour to represent protection as well as Christ figure and faith. I created other photos to go between these. These photos featured more influences from the photographer Laia Abril.
Laia Abril is another photographer that uses family archives to extend their narrative. Abril explored the damage eating disorder leave behind in her book ‘The Epilogue’. This book centers on the sad story of the Robinson family after losing their 26 year old daughter, Cammy to bulimia. The photographer deeply explore the grief experienced by the family. She does this by using flashbacks. These flashbacks can be seen in different ways. Abril uses photos of letters, key objects, places, testimonies told by different family members and friends. These especially, were full of deep grief as well as other emotions such as regret, guilt, frustration, distress, sadness all emotions that can be found with a sudden loss of a loved one. This book is very much a book about loss but also a book of awareness. It is letting people know this mental condition is a very real and it is a dangerous one not just affecting Cammy Robinson but many young people around the world. As well as taking inspiration from her the use of old family photos, I also took inspiration from her use of interviews. The photographer use images to go with some of these, photographing the family that had been left behind. Many of the photos of the family show them in deep thought which goes well with the interviews as it almost looks as if these voices are speaking in that persons head. I thought this was a good feature in the book as it gave the viewer a connection to the text that they were reading. Although Abril took these photos in a documentary style, I wanted to take these photos in a studio because that way I was able to control the lighting and focus on each person. The lighting was important in this shoot as it represented God. I used a chiaroscuro technique giving my photos a striking appearance. I interviewed key characters in my family about their faith. These people were of my Father, Brother and my Mother. I wanted to visualise the way they saw God and their Faith. I did this by using a spotlight in a dark room. I photographed the way each person reacted to that spotlight. From the photos I took, I matched with certain bible verses and sections from the interviews that corresponded with what was shown in the picture. These I found helped carry the book, as it was something the viewer can clearly see. Some of the photos that featured in the book were sometimes metaphorical or even abstract. Some photos had a clear relevance to the rest of the book, however others were not as clear. This was done purposefully as I didn’t want all the photos to be easy to understand. I find for a book to be interesting it has to feature some sort enigma code that needs to be broken by the viewer. This gives each viewer their own experience.
These questions also appear in Carol Benitah’s work as her work is also very metaphorical and leaves it to the viewer to work out the meaning. Although my book has moments where it isn’t very clear what the meaning is, there is a clear theme throughout. The theme of faith and having faith during difficult times is shown throughout and especially at the end of the book. The documentative style of interviews was inspired by the interviews that featured in Laia Abril’s book The Epilogue. These contrasts with metaphorical, artistic photos I have scattered in the book. I find this gives it a refreshing way to read the book. I also think it represents the way my mind works. Some memories are very clean cut and other memories are distorted. Altogether I think my book does show and develop the ideas of family archives and complex emotions just as these artists have.
Bibliography
Duggan, B http://bigthink.com/Picture-This/the-minds-eye-freud-and-photography
Benitah, C (https://www.lensculture.com/articles/carolle-benitah-photos-souvenirs
http://www.theartstory.org/movement-dada.htm
https://www.artsy.net/artwork/salvador-dali-the-enigma-of-desire-or-my-mother-my-mother-my-mother
Book layout
I start my book with a photo of a part from my Mothers journal. This is also the title of the book. The image has been wrapped round the book, covering the back and front of the book. The book starts with a bible verse which subtly explains the premise of some of the upcoming photos. I have separated my book into three different sections Father, Son and Mother this is very similar to the holy trinity which is the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. This was not purposefully done, I just thought it was worth mentioning. It then introduces my brother with a small snapshot of his eye. I included portraits of my brother doing different actions, I matched these with words from the interviews and bible verses that related well. In between these photos I wanted included old family archive photos that I had edited. These were used to separate each photo giving the book variety. The book followed a similar pattern through out. I wanted to show a variety of styles of photographs, sequenced in a such a way that they interrupt each other giving the reader something new to look at.
Just like the previous section there is a small snapshot however this time the person it the photo is my Father. This follows the same layout with slight differences. The old archive photos are of my Father is his youth and another one that is naturally abstract. The abstract photo did coincide with the meaning I was trying convey however I wanted to leave it unanswered as I wanted the viewer to work it out for themselves. Photos of my Father in his youth are matched with words of him talking about his youth.
My Mothers section starts with a small portrait that has been ripped. Then followed by a big portrait like previous sections. It then follows the same layout as previous parts of the book. This sections includes more dialogue. This is why I chose to have it at the end. The book then ends with a Bible verse.
There are 76 pages in total including the cover. 10 double spread photos and 26 Portraits. All photos apart from three are in color.
My Book
Full Essay – Final (Personal Study)
This the final draft if my essay. I will insert this into my book at the end with the included images to illustrate it. Once this is completed, I can upload my boko to Blurb and purchase it.
How have the photographers Matt Eich and LaToya Ruby Frazier explored themes of attachment and detachment in their own family through their work and, in particular, their most recent projects looking at family?
“As photographs give people an imaginary possession of a past that is unreal, they also help people to take possession of a space in which they are insecure.” [1]
My interest in photography derives from how raw and truthful an image or series of images are. I achieve satisfaction from photographs which show everything as it is without removing any factor of reality; it as it this point at which imagery loses my interest. I believe that this relates to the beauty that comes from images created from the insecurity from the person behind the camera. Within my own work, I attempt to do this. The space in which I am insecure encourages an emotional and physical urge and a sometimes-unwanted force to venture into a neighbouring space in which I feel less comfortable but more willing to experience more challenging emotions. It is with my camera and in my project looking at the reality of feeling attached yet isolated, that I can explore this feeling of lonesomeness. I am using my mum and dad’s divorce thirteen years ago as a starting point for the development of my series which centres around my experiences with the people closest to me. As I grow into an ever-maturing yet still sensitive man, I struggle to find myself in this fast-moving, fragile world; I find myself unknowingly becoming detached from the people who should be my most dear. I see this project as a way of building lost relationships. Using a subject close to my heart, I have been able to capture a view that feels very poetic, like that of Matt Eich and LaToya Ruby Frazier’s work. My aim is to make the intangible, tangible by collaborating closely with my subjects to create a meaningful insight into my family with room for interpretation by the viewer – an aspect I have been focusing on heavily for my project. I wish to create something for the audience to interact with (the book) and content the audience can relate with. Taking inspiration from photo-books of several artists, others including JH Engstrom and Anders Petersen and their use of images of several formats and styles, I have generated an immense interest in putting aside much of my time and effort to create a book, paying close attention to design, font, concept and other marginal details. My project is an exploration into my family and myself for personal satisfaction and as a visual documentation to cherish and keep, providing that very possession of a moment in time that can be so easily be forgotten. “Memory is fragile; the moments are fleeting and have to be wrestled into a permanent state” [2], said Eich in his statement for recent body of work, ‘I Love You, I’m Leaving’. It is with my photographs that memories become realised and documenting my own familial circle, like Eich and Frazier, I can provide a structure to my family’s memory that can be built to last instead of a moment in time being brushed aside and forgotten. It is the little moments that require time to step back and appreciate that we should treasure; when I release the camera’s shutter, is an acknowledgement that a moment is significant…
When I hear the word attachment, images of love surface within my mind. I visualise scenes of a girlfriend clinging lovingly to her boyfriend in moments of laughter and intimacy within their new-found romance; young love is what attachment is. Reasoning for this visualisation comes from experience. The knowledge that I am needed by someone else is what provides me with comfort. Attachment is feeling a sense of belonging within this world which can be so harsh in its unforgiving realities. Attachment and acceptance is something I long for in a life that has shown me, face-on and in a time of tenderness at the age of four, the direct implications of what love can do to two adults – unite, yet divide. I have grown up in two different lives, one with my mum and the other with my dad. Through this, I have been gently nurtured into a still-developing young man who has learnt and is still learning the meaning of romance. I have understood the sensation of sibling-love. As well, I have accepted the fact that my parents are no longer together and I will, for the rest of my life, live this life and embrace it, as I have done for the past 18 years. There is a still, however, the underlying reality of detachment which on the other hand, connotes opposing visuals; a lonesome astronaut drifting into a deep, dark existence without anything to cling on to.
Harry Harlow, an American psychologist in the mid-1900s studied, in great detail, the concept of maternal separation and dependency needs. He experimented with rhesus monkeys, an Asian species that adapts easily to living with humans [3]. He carried out an experiment in the laboratory to confirm theorist, Bowlby’s previous theory on attachment; Harlow separated the baby monkeys from their biological mothers and paired them with a surrogate mother in the form of a baby doll. He observed that, although the doll did not provide them with food or drink, at a time of feeling scared, the baby monkeys clung to the doll for comfort as it had adopted the roll of mother to them. Harlow used this to verify the importance of a mother-child relationship when the child is very young because it reiterates the idea of unconditional love. I feel very strongly that my own mum and I have experienced this when I was much younger and it has benefited our relationship over the last 18 years. This maternal attachment has expanded into a much more secure relationship as we have both developed into our own selves and, along the way, we have learnt to respect and trust each other, as a mother and son should. With my dad, however, he was the parental figure who was taken away from me. Oblivious to what this would mean to how I would experience future life events, I clung to my mum as a figure of comfort because the next few years of my infancy would prove to be a time of constant change as I moved from house to house to visit my dad wherever he was staying at the time. My project embraces both attachment and detachment and how I situate myself in the centre of it all.
Furthermore, the first 20 years of your life can prove to be the most important and impactful for the years to follow. In this period of time, the most vital events which contribute to self-growth and self-confidence occur. But not everything runs smoothly, as illustrated by my parent’s separation. It is with my camera that I am able to capture memories and when I pick up my camera and release the shutter it is then that I am acknowledging a moment of significance. Joerg Colberg said, in an article published outlining memory in photography, “just like memories, photographs are created with intent” and “all photographs, when used as memories, give us something to hold on to.” [4]. It is this interpretation by Colberg that resonates with my intent as a photographer to capture, consciously, the intimate moments in life. My parents took on this role when I was younger to provide me with the endless photo albums of my 9lb 12oz-self as a baby bouncing around the house I grew up in for 10 years. It is now that I am beginning to take inspiration from my own archival imagery of myself as a young child to capture similar moments of my half-sister, Minnie. As a photographer, I use my camera to collaborate not only with my subjects, but with myself when including myself within the images. Taking inspiration from the work produced by Matt Eich and LaToya Ruby Frazier in their diaristic black and white images for projects looking at family, I have been able to change my perspective from a witness to a performer; from being a witness to the occurrences in front of the camera, I have since found reward from being an actor who performs for the camera and it has expanded my abilities to tell a visual narrative – a skill I have developed from observations of the work of Swedish photographers, JH Engstrom and Anders Petersen. Looking at the books of these artists, I have developed the ability to collate select images which can in-turn have the power to provide meaning beyond the indexical of the photograph to impact the viewer.
Using the camera as a tool of documentation can provide outcomes that are very real and using these images as a way of telling a visual narrative can make for a much deeper, more meaningful story than that comprised of words, in my opinion. The work of Matt Eich shows this concept in its full affect, especially in that of his recent project ‘I Love You, I’m Leaving’. His imagery and way of composing and presenting images have the ability to work in conjunction with each other to create an obscure, yet very simple narrative in which the viewer is required to decode in order to derive meaning. This ability to present a reportage sequence which reveals only part of the story and leaves the remainder up to the audience’s imagination is something I am attempting to do in my project. By photographing inanimate states such as landscapes or still life, I can provide indirect and underlying representations of the main focus throughout the book. Much like literary stories, photographic stories can use metaphors to explain a meaning beyond the direct face value. An object as simple as a car covered by a cloth (an image I will use in my book) can connote a far more captivating significance than its face value and instead, using the context of my book, it can show the affect of a lost identity; the affect of a new beginning; becoming isolated and forcing a withdrawal from the people you love because it seems easier to hide away. It is these inanimate objects that provide substance and body to fill the gaps in my book because the project is an exploration into not only the people present but of the emotions that come with the concept I am exploring.
I make photographs with the intent to create memories so that moments of importance are not forgotten. I am forever holding a camera or a smartphone to capture any point in time in which I may be present and this has become a second nature now I am a big brother to my 5-year-old sister, Minnie. It fills me with joy to document with my camera the smiles and laughter which glow off my sister’s face every time I see her. As I have seen from my own family albums when I was a child, it is a way of creating these important memories that, inevitably lend themselves to never be forgotten, and in-turn manufacture a life-long feeling of attachment to what may have once been forgotten or mentally discarded. The photo albums which live in my loft are what allows me to experience my childhood again, where I can feel this magical sense of attachment at a point when it was just my mum, my dad and I. These memories; these shadows that I have near to no recollection of become illuminated when I flick through these never-ending photo albums. Mark Alice Durant, in his book ’27 Contexts, An Anecdotal History in Photography’ tells the reader of his experience when he re-lived his parent’s wedding album and quotes “in memory, colour comes alive, and for me it is only blue.” [5]. I feel very strongly about this message; the notion that an irretrievable recollection that, as the years go by, becomes a haze can be re-lived in the form of colour.
Eich’s work has a way of storytelling which affects the viewer to the point which, I for one, begin to feel quite out-of-place flicking through page after page because of the fact that it is a very personal and intimate insight into how his family live and his own place within it. Towards the end of Eich’s book, we are presented with an image of Eich’s wife, and his two children in the bath, looking blankly down the camera lens [6] – an image that I personally find enchanting because of its ability to connect with the audience – helped by the subjects immense focus on the camera, whether planned or not, it works brilliantly. The audience, although may get an urge to flick past quickly, it is vital to admire the rawness of the photograph and it echoes, again, how the camera can provide a way to tell a story easier in a poetic style.
Another image in his book uses a technique that is rarely seen in contemporary photography – a man showing his vulnerability and his sensitivity by including himself in his photographs. We see Eich, sat down and eyes-closed, with his head leant on the support of his wife’s stomach as she stands cradling its weight. Eich is topless and his wife stands in her bra and underwear. It is an image of such grace and elegancy. Images like these are avoided in photography but I admire the honesty of Eich to present himself to his own camera as he is doing. Using images which scratch upon the surface of taboo subject matter within photography, and society as a whole; this being certain representations of women through nudity and misogynistic references is brave but it gives a very raw feel to what we are seeing. In my own project, using my girlfriend, I have utilised the casual time we spend together in my bedroom to use my camera as a way of photographing her in a way which, for me, is normal. We often lie, lazily on my bed and talk for endless periods of time about anything. At this particular moment, she was lying in a way which looked quite seductive; curled up, in her t-shirt and tights, in which you could see her underwear through – a blue pair of briefs which read ‘WHATEVER, I TRIED’. Her rear pointing to camera, it makes for an image which divides the sequencing of dull, inanimate scenes in my book. This image provides a sense of spontaneity; it can be seen as naughty. Moments like these, shown in my project through this one image, Eich’s in his portrayal of an evening with his family and in Frazier’s through her snapshots of leisure time in their household [7] present this underlying theme of attachment. It is the moments that are ordinary and seen as just part of the daily routine within your own circle of comfort and joy that make for the most truthful representations of what attachment can be. Not acknowledging the presence of the camera is how memories are formed. Yet, referring back to the wording that takes its place on my girlfriend, Lucy’s underwear – ‘WHATEVER, I TRIED’ also connotes visuals of what detachment can be. Romance amongst young couples often brings its petty arguments – the phrase on Lucy’s underwear connotes this – that often she may try to fix an argument but it doesn’t always work and we find ourselves giving each other the cold shoulder – much like her body positioning suggests in this image.
Scanlan [8], in 2012, suggested the theory which provided an explanation to the importance of romantic development in adolescence, much like what I am experiencing as I grow, maturely into an adult, with my girlfriend as a mechanism of support. He said that teenage romantic relationships are, in a sense, a training ground for adult intimacy. He elaborated on this statement and said that romance during adolescence provides an opportunity for learning to engage strong emotions, to negotiate conflict, to communicate needs and to respond to a partner’s needs as well. Both Lucy and I often joke about the fact that we have been together for two years, because, considering we are only eighteen years of age, this is a significant period of time to maintain a relationship alongside all other demands of teenage life. At the start of our relationship, we both told one another that we would take it slow and see how it goes – because of the fact we were best friends for five years prior to our relationship, we didn’t see it going too far because we were used to living in comfort of a ‘friendzone’. However, now, in retrospect, I am relieved that circle of comfort was broken because she is the most important person in my life. I hope to show this in my project, ‘All My Love’ through the abilities of documentary photography and the ability to create sequencing of imagery to tell a story. We are only teenagers and love can be confusing but our relationship is simply a partnership of two alike personalities which coincide with one another to complement one another.
In Eich’s work, he doesn’t use his power as a photographer to abuse the relationship he holds with his wife, nor his children, nor his own parents and instead, like myself, uses his control of the camera to collaborate with his subjects that present a truthful picture of the benefits of clinging on to the ones you love most. Eich, in a mini-documentary series outlining his work and how he captures intimacy, said “I can articulate myself better with images than with words” [9]. This concept is very relevant to my own work also and is why I love shooting documentary images because it is the moments of intimacy between people, as well as a relationship between a person and a place that form the poetic images that make up my project. I have touched upon the relationship between people and places and the attachment that comes with this in my work through photographing the transition from my old family home to my new one – a process of losing one identity that has shaped your life for so long and generating a new identity. The process of change is something I do not deal with too well but it is with change that new opportunities exist to be photographed. Although I see change in any aspect of life as a negative, it is important to embrace it – as I did when my parents split; I had no choice. It emphasises the importance of forming an attachment to what comes with the change even though it is tempting to become disconnected instead.
Eich, in the same documentary, states that “photographing my family is incredibly important to me because it goes back to the frailty of memory” [10]. Memory is what Eich hopes he can use as a tool to tell his kids that he loves them and that he was there for their important moments of growth, to reflect back on when they are older. I use memory as a tool to do the same – to form a collection of images that holds meaning of a moment in time, but instead, as a way to show Minnie that I love her and that I was by her side to capture her moments of tranquillity and bliss. As a figure of authority over Minnie, I feel a sense of responsibility to act as a big brother should and provide her with the moments of fun she longs for when she asks me to play. I use my ability, as a teenager, to connect with Minnie as I watch her grow. She brings fun to my life and it is with a camera and with memory, this fun is everlasting. The colour that glows from Minnie’s personality comes alive in my images, made for her, from inspiration of my old childhood images.
In theorist, Dunn’s research surrounding attachment in sibling relationships in 2007, he stated that siblings serve as companions, confidants, and role models in childhood and adolescence [11]. This study came from the discovery made by Connidis & Campbell that siblings serve, instead, as sources of support throughout adulthood [12]. Although I am 18 years old, Minnie is only 5 and there is a 12-year age gap between us, I would like to think that I serve as a role model for my younger sister, as Dunn has stated is usually the case in sibling relationships. The moment I was told I was going to be a big brother, I felt as a sense of companionship between myself and my unborn sibling because it is such a special feeling – I longed to have a younger sibling during my time growing up. I had encountered in my life, the consequences of my parent’s detachment and I, because of this, became detached from my dad. I wanted that special someone to share a life with as we grew together and Minnie has provided me with that. I hope Minnie sees me as a role model but I certainly do see her as a companion and someone I can confide in.
Eich’s project, ‘I Love You, I’m Leaving’ consists of 64 pages and 46 photos. I have picked out one in particular and will critically analyse this in relation to family and intend to include discussions about underlying themes of attachment and detachment.
This photograph taken from Eich’s series is a very simple yet well executed and elegant image full of character. Because of it obscurity, I believe that is a very attractive and intriguing image that would draw me in to know more about the photographer as well as the project.
The image frames one person – who is unknown and the only part of the subject’s body that we can see is the subject’s feet poking out of the bottom of the silk sheet which falls gracefully, and rather ghostly over the shape and contours of the body underneath which is curled up in a rather, tight clustered ball-like shape, as if the subject is scared. Connotations of ghostliness and eeriness exuberate from this image. It is likely that the subject is one of Eich’s daughters who may be playing hide and seek or may in fact be hiding underneath these sheets because she is scared. The audience do not know the whole context of the image but this openness for interpretation is what provides intrigue. The image is very neutral in its formation and structure of greys which provide body to the image. The slight shadows which form from creases in the sheet which drape over the curled-up body contrast that of the harsh, darkened shadow of the feet which projects onto the wall in the background. Furthermore, the silk texture of the sheet provides a certain glow and shine to the overall look. It is a photograph of great skill and is one that I believe works brilliantly in a solitaire state, and does not need the other images from Eich’s work to give it meaning.
Although the little girl may only be playing around with her father as she hides under the sheet in a game of hide-and-seek, it is useful to look further into it to infer and interpret another meaning that could also be realistic. The fact that we cannot see the body underneath the sheet may represent a feeling a lost identity in the new life the family leads. Eich, along with his wife has made the joint decision that it would be best to move away to start a new life, to create more memories. It is likely that the children may have felt a sense of a lost identity that the home they once lived in and began their lives in has now been taken away. I am aware of this feeling from personal experience when I moved from house to house to visit my dad wherever he was staying at the time. After moving out of his home, he had to find a place to live which came as a struggle at the time and as his son, I felt quite confused but found ways to make the most of the new surroundings I found myself in when visiting him. This leads me onto to the notion of children letting their imaginations run free and finding enjoyment out of discovering places in your home to act as den-like nooks; these little places where you can go to sit and do nothing, as I once did. This image may be a demonstration of this.
Alongside Matt Eich, I have also been studying the hugely influential work of American artist and professor of photography, LaToya Ruby Frazier and in particular, her project entitled ‘The Notion Of Family’. Frazier is a very highly regarded figure in American culture. She is both a photographer and a motivational talker which she undertakes alongside her photography and video work to coincide with the images she produces. She is a well-known artist and her status is shown throughout her work through the pure thought that goes behind little details such as composition and framing. Her project looking at her family validates this.
Her work is inspired by influential American documentary-journalism photographer, Gordon Parks. He promoted the camera as a weapon for social justice. Frazier uses her tight focus to make apparent the impact of systemic problems, from racism to deindustrialization, on individual bodies, relationships and spaces [13]. In her work, Frazier is concerned with bringing to light these problems which she describes as global issues [14].
This is an image taken from LaToya Ruby Frazier’s project, ‘The Notion Of Family’ which is an “incisive exploration of the legacy of racism and economic decline in America’s small towns. The work also considers the impact of that decline on her communicability and her family.” [15].
The photograph frames both Frazier as a teenager and what looks like her mum. The project was completed over a period of 13 years in which, during this time, Frazier and her family grew yet, at the same time, declined due to the economic state of the town they were living in. She says that she does not pretend to speak for the Braddock community or African-Americans as a whole and instead intends to simply photograph the three generations of herself, her mum and her grandmother by representing the substandard living conditions and human cost of political neglect [16]. We see Frazier on the right sat on the edge of her bed and, on the left side, her mum lies, relaxed on her bed in the parent’s room, with her back to the camera – likely oblivious to the camera’s presence as I would imagine Frazier would not have wanted to tell her mum that she was taking the picture as it may have removed the element of reality.
The visual divide we see between both subjects can also represent an emotional separation between the two of them; the relationship they have with one another may be very weak and this could be as result of the economic crisis in which the town of Braddock faces. They both have their back to each other and this could represent their, perhaps dislike for one another. Furthermore, the wording on the back if her vest may in fact be quite ironic because the mood that Frazier’s’ persona is indicating is one of hatred. We can’t actually see the mother’s face and instead, get a view of her back and her vest which reads ‘THE SMOOTH EDGE’ and this could be an accurate representation of her or perhaps ironical – she may in fact be the smooth edge or instead, may be a figure that causes a division between the entire family. An individual who Frazier may get along with and from this, the statement can be seen as ironic as she could be instead branded as ‘THE SHARP EDGE’. Perhaps her positioning with her back facing the viewer is how she is seen to Frazier – as though she does not show her face in the most crucial of times as she has been growing up – she may have been dislocated from family life.
In conclusion, this image could represent the breakdown of family life, shown in this one image due to the crisis that Braddock faces as a result of explicit and constant discrimination against the black community. They are crying for help within and it is kept this way – internal and within the four walls of their home because they are too scared to speak up. As a result, they become isolated and damaged to a point that they do not know how to show it – detachment from social norms and a distancing from society as a collective – this is Frazier’s family – dislocated from the rest of America and detached from one another because of it.
With reference to other images within her detailed exploration into family life, Frazier encapsulates in its entirety, the meaning of post-modernist photography. Post-modernist art borrows from references of historical, cultural, social and psychological issues – as Frazier does. Her photographs are more than just an observation of family life – they present the life of a family within the struggle of racism. Frazier uses references of racism and economic decline throughout the book with added an orientation on Bill Cosby – a household name in the American society in the mid-late 1900’s but allegations of sexual assault against his name was released and he became a figure of hate and remorse – as though he betrayed the black culture. Frazier uses this post-modernist approach to highlight key events in American history. Additionally, it again restates the cost that comes with a familial detachment; becoming quiet because of a lack of interest from a parental figure. Frazier shows this consequence which she had to face alone and silently – she looks as though she is suffering in silence, as though she as well longs for an attachment with a figure because it provides a sense of belonging – something I have the knowledge of from experience.
Photography should be used as a means to form bonds within your own familial circle. The camera is a powerful instrument and should be utilised to its full function; it only benefits your ability as a photographer to create relationship with your subjects and it is a way to find that intimacy that makes for very real photographic work. I have aimed to create a miss-matched diary of poetic imagery which, at its face value, looks muddled but on closer inspection, holds meaning and memory beyond what words can express. My project intercepts the safety net that an attachment brings and expands on the damage that comes with a detachment but these themes are underlying as the forefront comprises of where I stand in my own life with the people within it. There is no easy way to document the content matter surrounding my parent’s divorce but I have attempted to achieve this in a way that recognises its existence in a light-hearted way. I have neither forgotten the relationship they once had nor have I avoided showing their divorce as a cause of damage for me. Yet, I have attempted to use my relationship with my girlfriend as a contrast to what my parents once had. The content touches upon how I, in the company of Lucy develop into the individual I am at the age of 18 where I drift, naturally further away from the two figures who raised me. My mum and dad are at the forefront of my quality of living but I wanted to focus on how I am centred in the middle of these experiences. An attachment is bound to come at the cost of a detachment and I have learnt this in the past couple years I drift away from my friends and become closer with my girlfriend of two years.
Taking inspiration from artist such as Matt Eich and LaToya Ruby Frazier, I have been able to understand how to use my camera to create a skilful and expressive snapshot of a moment in time, which, eventually will come together with several other images to create a sequence and visual narrative of a personal exploration.
Both Matt Eich and LaToya Ruby Frazier explore the themes of attachment and detachment in a very close manner, and his is evident in the quality of their work. Both artists’ work are very similar in the way they are produced where, most of the time, every image sees their family within a moment – it is a snapshot of a moment in time and this allows them to express a story that is personal to them both. The audience can see this clearly and because of this, we are able to build connections with each character in the story – the reader can form a sense of sympathy for a character or experience their sense of joy depending on the particular scene. Throughout, however, Eich and Frazier explore closely, the attachments and detachments that arise within their family and how this affects them – in the centre. What I like is that Eich and Frazier position themselves in the centre of all the action and produce a project that considers their own feelings and emotions that come from a detachment – whether it is because of an economic decline or a divorce. It still affects the reader to the point where we don’t want to it the book down because of the photographs ability to speak not only for the characters in the story but for other people.
Bibliography:
[1] Sontag. S (1977), On Photography. London: Penguin Books
[2] The Fence (2017), Matt Eich: I Love You, I’m Leaving. The Fence: http://fence.photoville.com/artist/love-im-leaving/
[3] Exploring Your Mind (2017), Harlow’s Experiments On Attachment Theory. Exploring Your Mind: https://exploringyourmind.com/harlows-experiments-on-attachment-theory/
[4] Colberg. J (2012), Photography and Memory. Conscientious Extended: http://jmcolberg.com/weblog/extended/archives/photography_and_memory/
[5] Alice Durant. M (2017), 27 Contexts, An Anecdotal History in Photography. London: SaintLucy Books
[6] Eich. M (2017), I Love You, I’m Leaving. Italy: ceiba editions
[7] Ruby Frazier. LT (2014), The Notion Of Family. U.S.: Aperture
[8] Moore. S (2016), Teenagers In Love. The Psychologist: https://thepsychologist.bps.org.uk/volume-29/july/teenagers-love
[9] Curate Series (2014), The Scene (Local & Emerging Art Series) Matt Eich: Capturing Intimacy (Ep.5). [online video]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SwvPgyHqfs
[10] Curate Series (2014), The Scene (Local & Emerging Art Series) Matt Eich: Capturing Intimacy (Ep.5). [online video]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SwvPgyHqfs
[11] D. Whiteman. S, M. McHale. S, Soli. S (2011), Theoretical Perspectives on Sibling Relationships. NCBI: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3127252/
[12] D. Whiteman. S, M. McHale. S, Soli. S (2011), Theoretical Perspectives on Sibling Relationships. NCBI: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3127252/
[13] Berger. M (2014), LaToya Ruby Frazier’s Notion of Family. The New York Times: https://lens.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/10/14/latoya-ruby-fraziers-notion-of-family/
[14] MacArthur Foundation (2015), LaToya Ruby Frazier. MacArthur Foundation: https://www.macfound.org/fellows/937/
[15] Ruby Frazier. LT (2014), The Notion Of Family. LaToya Ruby Frazier: http://www.latoyarubyfrazier.com/work/notion-of-family/
[16] Berger. M (2014), LaToya Ruby Frazier’s Notion of Family. The New York Times: https://lens.blogs.nytimes.com/2014/10/14/latoya-ruby-fraziers-notion-of-family/
Book Production Process – Final Design/My Intentions + Evaluation of Book
Over the past couple of weeks, I have begun to create my photo book for my coursework. The work I have been producing up to this point has all been leading up this stage in which I can begin to insert them carefully into my photo book, which I am creating on the Adobe Lightroom interface using the Blurb book-making software.
To begin the process, I selected all appropriate images from all shoots completed and whittled these down to my favourite edits I had done as I gradually progressed through the coursework. I then created a new folder in Lightroom named ‘Book’ where in which all images I wanted to use in my photo book would be placed and began by putting in my already finalised images into here and then transferred these from the ‘library’ stage in Lightroom to the ‘book’ stage where I could begin arranging the images how I wanted and selected the particular book orientation I wanted and the type of paper.
I chose to use standard portrait orientation for my book as, from looking at other artists photo books, been attracted to this the most because of how it looked and how it felt in the hand when reading. I have also chosen to use a paper named ‘ProLine Uncoated’ paper which I saw on the Blurb website and thought this looked very effective. It does not have a gloss to it so looks very natural which I like. I believe it will benefit my images look in the end. After ding this task, I began arranging my photos as I wished. I have used a wide range of different image layouts but I tried to stick with a narrow range of looks so the whole outcome does not look to muddled and difficult to read. The most common page type is a double page spread where in which one image takes up two pages on a 3/4 proportion so is not full bleed and this has had the best effect on the look of my photos to complement the smaller, more delicate still images and that of full bleed, detailed portraits.
My plan for my photo book is to produce a detailed and insightful exploration into my family life, with me centered within the middle. This is the running theme throughout and I hope to show it through poetic, still images of landscapes or objects which may have no direct meaning at its face value but has a deeper meaning once inferred. As well, the portraits in my project are intended to be collaborative and intimate to show the relationships I hold with the people in my life but the portraits are intended to show the emotion of each being as well. I have contrasted yet shown the similarities of my mum and dad’s relationship when they were together to that of my relationship with Lucy now and the overall look I hope to achieve is that of a fun, vibrant, light-hearted but quite solemn and sombre image-based diary about how I am still developing through the events if life and the attachments I have built from the event which shaped my life – my mum and dad’s divorce. I want their to be an obvious existence of the theme of attachment but also an underlying theme of detachment. Although these themes are the main focus for my book, they are underlying themes which are subtly hinted at every now and then by a sequence which develops upon the understanding of love. Memory is fragile and I use this notion as a driving force for my project made up of diaristic photographs, which, when come together, create an album of moments in time which in-turn lend themselves to never be forgotten. I have attempted not to avoid the subject of my mum and dad’s divorce but felt it easier to express this and my feelings towards it through other subject matter, being my relationship with my girlfriend and the other people in my life, such as my individual relationships with my mum and dad and how I view them in solitary opposition to one another.
My plan for the front and back cover of my photo book was to keep it very simple and plain and include just the title ‘All My Love’ situated, in small print on the cover of the book and include a digitised version of an archival image on the back cover, with no writing. I was originally going to include another archival image in the front cover, however, instead of digitised and printed by Blurb, I was going to manually tip in the photo on the cover when it came back to me after production. Because I have chosen a softcover, this would have been possible – to, with a blade, make an incision into the card and place my image within these, like in old family photo albums. However, I decided not to go ahead with this and instead will just leave the title and the title only on the cover to keep in simple and leave the rest up to the audiences intrigue from reading the title. In the industry of photo books in the current day, it is the new trend not to include a photo on the cover at all and instead just a title or an abstract close up of an object, or even a painting or drawing etc.
I have chosen to place the title, in size 16 font, near to the bottom of the page and in the middle. I prefer the look of the title near to the bottom of the cover as opposed to the centre because it doesn’t follow typical conventions or norms to place text in the middle of a page.
I wanted to have a base colour for my book – a main colour that I use on the cover and back pages as well on the first few pages that hold the book together and as a background colour for a couple images in the book – which I have done. I have chosen to use a dusty, almost faded, dark-ish pink colour that connotes visuals of love and romance bit it’s faded colour represents a sense that this love may have also faded.
On the spine I have included the title as well as my name, because I am the author of the book. I chose not to put it on the font as I didn’t feel the need because I feel as though the project is not as much a project about me and more about the other people within. I did not want the audience to focus on me a photographer and instead focus on the title and what it could mean.
On the back cover is an image of my mum and I at the age of 3. I am sat on mt chair at the kitchen table in the house I grew up in for 10 years. This photo was taken on my birthday and my mum kneels by mu side as my dad takes the photo as we both smile at the lens. This image brings back very happy memories as I see both my mum and I in a joyous trance at this happy time.
The first two pages of the book consist of a white page non the left and the page on the right is printed in the same pink colour as the cover. On the white page on theft, I have included the ‘Luce’ family crest which I drew and then digitised. I have put this black and white emblem in the center of the page in a very small size because once printed, it will appear bigger so have compensated for this by making it even smaller than I originally would, however want it to look small and delicate anyways so the reader has to focus on the details of it. I have not included a caption which says what the crest is either because I did not want to give too much away.
On the right page I have included the title again with my name underneath and in a dark pink colour to contrast the lighter, dusty oink of the background. This is a common convention of photo books – to include the title and author’s name again in the first pages of the book before any images have been seen.
The first image, as I stated in my previous blog post is the image of the wedding cards and I have made this a full bleed image to get the full effect of the details within the cards.
On Lightroom, the controls are very easy to manage and I quickly got the hang of how to use the different tools and how to change different settings.
The next image, on pages 6 and 7 again takes up two pages and is a portrait of my girlfriend Lucy and I. This was an image I took using an expired black and white film in a Pentax MZ-M camera. The results of using an expired film has resulted in a change in affect of the image quality as it has added grain a swell as different light and brightness. It has made it darker as though it was under exposed but this was an effect I was aware of when using the roll of film and one I am happy with the results of. I have used a couple of other images from this roll of film in the book. The image which is a 3/4 page spread uses the white background as a means of a border to make the darkened image stand out. It is an image of myself and Lucy on my bed looking straight into the camera lens. We are centered in the frame and interlock are arms as Lucy leans on to me. The film has added a slight vignette effect to the edges of the photograph which I like and my intention for this image was to oppose the view of my mum and dad’s mature relationship from the image previous to this to that of mine an Lucy’s relationship which is much more fun, however, still somber in this particular image, emphasised in it’s darkness – as I intended to achieve in post-production.
I have then used another black and white image as a 3/4 page spread on the next two pages. It is an image taken with my iPhone of a tangled ribbon tied to a tree trunk as it blows in the wind. This photograph is intended to represent the idea of an attachment and a romance – in that a tied ribbon symbolises a knot – as though you tie the knot when marrying, as well as the connotations of love and romance of a ribbon tied in a girl’s hair or ribbon displayed on the back of a wedding car of newly-wed couples.
Next, I have included the text from both of the wedding cards written by my mum and dad. On the left page is the text written by my mum and on the right, my dad’s words. I wanted to disrupt the sequencing of the book by purposely not putting this text directly after the image of the cards because this how intrigue is created in a photo book.
The pages after this display juts one image, on the left. It is an image of my mum and dad when they were younger and had just fallen in love. They take a photo of themselves in bed as they lean against the wallpaper covered walls of my dad’s bedroom. You can see in the toip right corner part of a surfing poster of my dad’s as he was a surfing fanatic in his youth. It is an image that represent their romance as well as that of other couples as they document their intimacy in the fist couple years of falling in love. They look so happy and this I love. However, although this image is in place in the digital book, I am going to remove this before it gets sent off for production and when I received it again, I will use photo corner to tip in the real version of this image. This will add a sense of realness and make it more personal as well as something for the reader to physically interact with and experience the smell and feel of real photo paper which has been maturing over the last 25 years. This image works in conjunction with the text before.
On the following page is another archival image taken from my mum and dad’s wedding album. It frames both of them in the car they both arrived in and left in. My mum holds a bouquet a flowers as my dad leans in for the picture as they both smile form ear-to-ear. This image will be printed by Blurb directly into the book, not tipped in.
On pages 16 and 17 I have included my next image in the sequence which has is so far made up of 5 images. This image as taken in my garden and was not planned but instead a more spontaneous shot. The image is a close up of a dandelion and is representation of how love can be so delicate and fragile. I was instantly drawn to this flower because it sat in the grass very lonesomely, solitary from any other dandelions – this was the only one in the garden and it struck me instantly and had the urge to take a photo of it. After taking the image, I realised that the plant also connotes a deeper meaning of love – derived from the love poem children sued to sing whilst picking the petals of a flower or blowing the petals of a dandelion. Yu would sing “he/she’ loves me… he/she loves me not” where you would seek if the person of your affection returns that affection and the phrase said on the pick of the last petals determines whether he or she does love you or doesn’t. I have chosen to make this image a full bleed because the darkness of the grassy area surrounding the dandelions white petals contrasts that of the white page opposite.
The next image is an image if Lucy cutting my mum’s hair in the kitchen. My mum sits on a stool in the kitchen as Lucy makes an orbit around her cutting her hair making sure it is as she wishes. My girlfriend is a qualified hairdresser and so my mum asked if she would be kind enough to cut it for her. On the evening of this happening, Lucy and my mum had set up and I decided to photograph the occurrences through the reflection of out kitchen door. I am framed within this image too because of this but the lights from the kitchen have illuminated my mum and Lucy so they are the focus and it is one of my favourites in the book because of its obscurity from the others – it includes the photographer which is seen as going against the rules and it is taken through a reflection. The image signifies a loss of identity as my mum loses some hair and this notion is reiterated in the identity lost as a result of my mum and dad’s split.
The following page is of another 3/4 page spread of an image which was from the same shoot as the one before. It is an image of the hair from my mum’s head on the floor, in wet clumps. After the haircut was finished, I quickly got my camera gain and released the shutter whilst pointing it at the floor to capture the aftermath of the cut. It is intended to co-exit with the image previous to it as a diptych across two pages.
I have then used another full bleed image of a portrait of my dad on the next page. This image is a black and white portrait of my the back of my dad’s head and shoulders. I have harshly cropped it just below the shoulders and didn’t know what I thought of it when I first imported into Lightroom. It is an unconventional portrait that is made of very dark, neutral greys with little contrast of blacks and whites. This darkness adds to its graveness however and I think it works well. The fact that you cannot see my dad’s face and instead, the back of it adds to this essence that he was a hidden figure in my childhood and I did in a way lose him as a dad for period of my life because this was a consequence of my mum and dad separating.
After these two pages comes another image which juxtaposes the content of the previous. It is a black and white photograph of a window in which there is a smiley face drawn on because of the condensation. I drew this smiley face on the window and thought i would make for an interesting image that shows happiness in a different sense. It is as though it is a smile, that it doesn’t really exist – or a smile that exists for a small period of time but then fades away – like what you attempt to o when you’ve experiences a detachment – put on a fake smile which is eventually erased. This smile contrasts that of the dull looking portrait of my dad on the page before. I decided to frame the mage on a black background because this way the photograph stood out better and it forms a division from the repetitive white pages that have been used thus far.
The next two images also work in conjunction with each the as a diptych. The first is of a goal I set up in Millbrook Park and the second is also in Millbrook Park but of the swimming pool that is in the park. I went to the park a few moths ago to do this shoot. The two image represent myself and my dad’s relationship – I remember he sued to take to Millbrook Park when I was younger and used to stay at his on Saturdays. We would go on Sunday mornings and play football with a goal we would set up with the bin lids and out jackets. I also used to go swimming in the pool in the summer and this brings back memories of my time with him and we use to do this most weekends when the weather was nice. I decided to include his because of the concept of memories and it symbolises my attachment with my dad when I would stay the night at his on the weekends, however, this relationship has since gone from cherishing moments with each other to seeing very little of each and I understandably never stay at his anymore because I am of the age where I want to do my own thing.
On the next page I have included another archival image bit this time of a two sets of two photo booth images – one of my dad on his onw and the other of my mum and I as a baby. These images were taken at different images and one sees my dad on his onw posing for the camera and the other of my mum and I posing for the camera. I came across both of them at different times during my time delving into my family’s family albums. I placed the photo on the same white card used for other shoot with old photographs and purposely placed my dad’s set above the one of my mum and I and to left, I noticed that my dad was looking down got the corner of the image frame coincidentally on the bottom image and thought it would look interesting if I placed this image so that it looked as though he was looking at my mum and I. I feel as though I achieved this well.
The next image in my book is a double page spread, with a slight white border. I have used a photograph I took of a car with its protective cover over it. This image came from a shoot I produced at my old home. This is my Papa’s vintage Ford car which has its protective cover over the top of it most of the time to reserve its quality and value. I saw it sitting there and the white/grey colour of the cover contrasted greatly with the dark green colour tat came from his shed behind the car. I though tit would make for a great image and in post-production I deliberately reduced the exposure and crated more shadows and increased the intensity of the black colour to make the lightness in the cover over the car stand out more. It is one of my favourite images because it’s likeness to that of the style of Matt Eich or other contemporary photographers such as New Topographic photographer Lewis Baltz. It represents the fragility of the importance of protection and security – the outer shell provided by the cover is what is hiding the car and it is as though it is showing only part of its personality but wishes to hide in order to preserve it’s beauty for the right time – like what my dad and mum, in some ways, did when they split from each other – they became more reserved until they found another partner.
The image on the following page frames the window sill in my house. I made this photograph of the window sill in my lounge because I wanted to focus on the images that took their place on it – as a centrepiece of the room – two framed photographs of me as a young child – one when I was around 5 years of age and the other on holiday when I was 10. This photographs purpose was to bring myself – the centre subject of the project – back into focus to reiterate that, as my mum’s only child, she likes to take pride in me and tells me constantly how much she loves me – I enjoy the meaning and simplicity of this image because it shows me as a young child and contrasts that of what I am like now – in a relationship with my girlfriend and living much more independently, as well as forming an ever-growing relationship with my sister. I chose to make this black and white because this looked most effective and I took inspiration form LaToya Ruby Frazier’s image much like this to create this photograph.
For the next image, I used some personal objects to create a representation of love and attachment in another perspective. In my lounge at home, we have displayed the characture figures of Lady and the Tramp – two china mini figures of the two dogs form the animated film. The film is about how two dogs fall in love and my mu, being a collector of vintage and antique goods, came across these two figures and decided to buy them and they now take their place in our lounge. I had never really thought anything of them until this project when I was finding ways to photograph things that I never easily would have before and think of things in ways I never would have before. I saw these figures and realised the story behind them and realised it would be perfect if I photographed them in my mini studio set-up. I photographed them together against a white background and made this black white. I love this image and its relationship with love and romance, but just shown in an unusual way. I have again used a black background to frame it – creating the colour theme of white, black and pink.
A full bleed, coloured photograph of my dad takes its place on the following two pages and feel like this sis one of my strongest images due to it’s crispness and sharpness of detail that makes this such a busy image. However, the busyness works because there are two clear focal points in the photograph – my dad sat on the sofa with his glass of wine and the TV which is playing EastEnders. The TV illuminates the rest f the room and in particular, my dad watching the screen. I have taken the image from a far to capture the whole scene and have used a flash as I experimented without but the quality was not as I wanted. This is the second image of my dad in which you do not his whole face and instead, just a side profile. However, there are direct, face-n portraits if my mum in the book and this restates the underlying reality that he is still hidden away and keeps himself to himself sometimes.
The reader then turns the page and sees another 3/4 page spread of a black and white image from the same roll of black and white film used in the Pentax camera. It is an image taken near to Christmas when out on a walk. It captures the top of a castle near to Grouville Bay. I pointe my camera upwards as I saw these pigeons were flying in and out of this one gap in the castle. I waited for the right time to capture the point at which two pigeons sat side by side in this opening in the castle’s wall. This image shows again, in a different way to break the monotonous sequencing of human interaction, what an attachment can look like – or a relationship between two people.
The following image keeps with the theme of animals and was also taken on the shoot to my old house. This is in fact my old cat which we had for 9 years, but, when we moved away from the house we grew up in with our cat, Betty, she ran away back to our old house and has stayed there ever since and now my Papa looks after her. Whenever I go back there, I always see Betty and she comes over to see me so I can stroke her. I made this image of her staring in to the distance as she sits on the ground and this also shows a sense of detachment.
Another black and white image takes its place on pages 44 and 45 in the form of a 3/4 page spread – this is a common convention and theme of my book and it is what I used to provide a structure to the layout sand sequencing because mots of my images, as I found out when arranging them in the book, look better in this format. It is a portrait of my mum which I took as she stood in the lounge and what I like about the image is her facial expressions and the way the she stands out very clearly from the background. There is ghostly presence and eerie mood to the image as I have used the flash on my camera. This was an image that was very much needed as I had a lack of images of my mum in the current day.
When I was round at my sister’s house where she lives with her mum a couple months ago, I was playing all sorts of games with her and it was at one pint that she got at her gingerbread men decoration set. She received this as a gift at Christmas and wanted to use it with me when I came round. We spent half an hour decorating ur gingerbread men and afterwards, I decided to photograph them both together on the chopping board we were using. I photographed this using my phone using an app called ‘Huji’ which makes images look very retro and visually eye-catching due o the colour and light affects it ads to the image once taken. The colours are very vibrant and I love the effects which come with it and I often use to capture everyday moments as opposed to my iPhone’s default camera app. The image brings the added and necessary vibrance in my book which I wanted to achieve through photographs that have a relation to my time with Minnie because this is what represents the fun we have together – the colour that comes from her personality and our experiences although she does not appear in the book too often.
When Lucy and I visited the island of Sark for couple of days in the summer last year, I took my point and shoot camera – my Canon SureShot A-1 and used it to take some photographs of the time we spent cycling and walking around the island for the two days we were there. On the following pages, I have created a photo album affect where in which I have arranged 4 images that I took of our time in Sark – two portraits of Lucy and I and two landscapes of the coastline and both sets work together as diptychs. On the first page I have used the face-on portrait of Lucy and underneath I have placed the landscape shot of what was behind her, however, in it’s own image and this creates a continuity effect which works well as a diptych. Lucy also took my picture on the day after and captured the landscape in which we were surrounded by afterwards as it its own image. This also makes for an effective diptych which I have represented on the opposite page and with the portrait of us both diagonal to one another.
The next page consist of a photo over a double spread of myself and Minnie waiting at the top of a slide at Tamba Park. Lucy has taken this image with my Canon point and shoot camera and is a great image because it sees Minnie looking with a grin on her face at the camera and myself gazing at Minnie’s joy as we get ready t launch ourselves down the slide. The next couple pages are about colour and vibrancy and the notion of playing and going back to childhood. Even though the next image is a black and white portrait of Minnie, she is looking into the camera with a ice lolly in her hand ready to lick it and it reveals a sense of fun and play behind it. This image was previously an image of Minnie going down a fireman’s pole in the same park as the image before with Lucy watching on as the both laugh but the image was not very strong and didn’t feel it fitted into the sequence so instead replaced it with a portrait of Minnie. I talk about her often in my essay but never really show her in my book and this image was needed in order for her presence to be realised.
Keeping on the same them as play and childhood fun, the following image is one I took in the garden in which I used to play in all the time at my Papa’s house. It was called the children’s garden because all most of my cousins on my mum’ side of the family used to live in the estate in which my Papa owns and rents the houses in it out to tenants – being my family and my other cousins families. This was the garden which we all used to play in together after school and I used to play football with my younger males cousins all the time. The image frames a goal in the garden with the netting behind it and the field which surrounded the garden. The image looked best on a full page spread to emphasise the wide angle landscape view. This concept of play reiterates the importance of living in the moment and, for me, reminds me of childhood and the community that out whole family was.
On the next two pages is two other images – the first is of a charm/jewel that my mum owns and has owned for several years. It reminds both her and myself of the time that my dad and her spent together when OI was much younger. The delicate, very small charm was part of a bracelet but now only this pendant exists. The charm is of a girl and boy holding hands. Very simple but a jewel that presents relationships very clearly. My mum decided to get this tattooed on her ankle when she was with my dad and she also added a heart in the middle where their hands joined to show the love between her and my dad. I wanted to show the relationship between this jewel and her tattoo and so arranged them side by side and used the image I took of my mum’s ankle as a full page spread with the tattoo being the centre point of focus.
The next image is from the same shoot I did with my mum and Lucy when she cut my mum’s hair bit this closer image of the two subjects presents a more intimate photograph of my mum staring, rather glumly as she loses the hair Lucy is cutting. I have put after the image of the charm/tattoo because it juxtaposes this notion attachment and detachment through a loss of identity.
This theme is followed on, onto the next two pages where the audience see a image of my old house which I grew up in for 10 years and an image on the opposite page of a pick-up truck with a load of furniture. This shows the event at which my mum, her boyfriend of 13 years and I moved out of this house and into our current one.
Next, is a portrait I took of Lucy sitting on my window ill. This was during an evening which we saw each other after I had finished school and she had finished work. She was lounging around in my fleece without any bottoms on and I had an idea to have her sit on the window ill which is big enough for somebody to sit on comfortably because of it depth. I wanted to take her picture as she stared blankly into the camera with her head rested on her les which were bent. This portrait shows the same style of image Eich used in his book where his own wife is pictured staring into the camera but from a closer perspective. This is more of a loner shot which frames both Lucy and the window sill. I added grain to the photograph in post-prediction because this looked affective and I purposely added aa slight hint of grain whilst taking the picture through slight incorrect adjustments of my camera settings so their was a blur and subtle noisy texture but emphasised this in Lightroom.
To conclude my book about attachments and detachments within my life and consequences of what love can do but what, on the other hand, it can achieve for the positive – it can unite people, I will be using another archival image which I have decided to also tip in with phot corners. I decided to do this with an image if my mum and dad in bed when they were much younger and had inly been dating for around a year. Again, will be using this same technique to tip in an image of my mum, dad and I when I was born. I found this image within the endless photo albums we keep in my loft. My mum holds me after I had just been born as she lies in bed with me in her arms, my dad kneels beside her with his arm around us both as they both look in the camera with joy and relief. It may have made sense to use it a at the start but with my book I have essentially started with an equilibrium. I presented the images surrounding my mum and ad’s wedding and marriage at the start – the balance and then this was disrupted in the middle and the focus came onto me. Finally, towards the end, I have subtly hinted again at this divide and this separation of people. I wanted to include this image of family at the end to show that although my project has been about a loss of parental figures and confusion among myself as to where I lie in my family as I am introduced to person upon person including my sister, her mother, my mum’s boyfriend, my own girlfriend and friends, I still manage to find a sense of belonging within my own being and can accept everything and embrace it because my family – the focus of this coursework – is who I love and who I choose to attach to because I feel my place among the fragility of my family circle is important and significant. Documenting this with my camera is something I have greatly enjoyed and wanted to end the book with a photo that is not mine because my project has been a collaboration wit my subjects and although I am the photographer, the subjects are what provides intrigue and meaning to what I am photographing.
final edits to photo book
To fully complete my book I needed to add the last details to it, such as the title. The title “Inside Out” came from my main idea for the project , which was to express hidden emotions in a physical way using the human body. The name Inside Out represents this concept of showing the inside feelings on the outside. Another thing I wanted to add to my book to make it look more aesthetically pleasing and professional was too add some colour onto the pages where the poems where going to be. I made sure that the colour stuck with the colour theme, and also linked to the colour on the opposite page. Overall, I am very happy with the final edits of my photo book.
